when life sucks… You can always see it from the bright side

Today my mom was looking for the nail polish remover in my closet. Instead, she found a box of condoms, a pink vibrator, and a pregnancy test… all right next to each other. FML

January 4, 2020 at 2:05 pm Add a comment!

Good thing she didn´t found a dead body.

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« Today, I was having sex with my girlfriend when I said the wrong name in bed. On top of that it was the name of her ex-husband’s ex-girlfriend. Who he cheated on my girlfriend with while they were together. FML

Today, my date and I were getting to know each other, and we talked about our favorite music. He’s into metal. Trying to impress him, I mention I like metal too. He said his favorite band is “The Gonzorks” and I mentioned that’s my favorite too. He looked at me dead and cold and said “Um, actually that band doesn’t exist.” FML »