Today, after my boyfriend dumped me, my job cut my hours, and my toddler got an ear infection, all I wanted was a takeaway after I finally got her to sleep. I fell asleep too and never heard the doorbell, so they left my food by the door where rats got at it. FML
You didn´t need that extra weight anyway.
Today, I was at the Wendy’s drive-through with my four kids in the car. As the worker handed me my food through the window, a man wearing a ski mask ran right between us, snatched the bags of food and took off. They refused to refund me for the food, because they said I staged the whole thing. FML
Well, you probably did. Otherwhise how hard would it be following a runing man with your car?
Today, I had to go to the ER because of a terrible allergic reaction I had to the cookies my “friend” made for me. She assured me several times that there were no nuts in them. Turns out, she put nuts in them on purpose, to see whether or not I was really allergic. FML
Good thing you had a reaction so she didn´t proved you wrong.
Today, I watched a customer open a bottle of salad dressing, taste it, then just put it back on the shelf. FML
Maybee it was not a good salad dressing. Now you know that and can replace it with another one.
Today my boyfriend’s mom fed me a new dish containing peanuts knowing full well I’m severely allergic. According to her, her ancestors “cured” allergies by exposing the person to the allergen. I went into anaphylactic shock. FML
Yea, it might take a couple of exposures though…
Today, I went on a first date with a guy. As soon as we sat down at the restaurant, he immediately snatched my menu and said “You’re having salad.” FML
Well, two good things, you don´t have to think more about that, and you will get a heathy meal…
All knowledge is good knowledge
Today, I set my beer on the windowsill while I made space for it on the table. Suddenly, the wind knocked the window open. Into my beer. Into a box of expensive electronics. It was the last beer. FML
Today, I gave my dad $40 and asked him if he can get me lunch on his way back home. Long story short he came back empty handed telling me it was my fault for trusting him with McNuggets. FML