when life sucks… You can always see it from the bright side

Today, I sent a dude a snapchat of my food. He responded with a video of him taking a shower, nude. FML

Just send a nude video back and then. Ha ha you got him.

Today, I had to go to the ER because of a terrible allergic reaction I had to the cookies my “friend” made for me. She assured me several times that there were no nuts in them. Turns out, she put nuts in them on purpose, to see whether or not I was really allergic. FML

Good thing you had a reaction so she didn´t proved you wrong.

Today, the only “Happy birthday!” I got was from the cake I bought for myself. FML

Don´t worry. You might get a suprise-party from yourself to before the day is over.

Today, my best friend told me she didn’t want to be my friend anymore, because she wanted to start afresh in college and have pretty friends. FML

You can probably find some new pretty friends in college.

Today, I felt so lonely that when I was watching a ghost show, I wished my house was haunted so at least some sort of presence was with me, even if it was in another dimension. FML

You always have Molgan.

Today, I organized a party at my place, invited 20 people, bought snacks and cancelled my workout. Nobody showed up. I ended up eating a whole ciabatta alone. FML

To bad you canceled your workout. You should have just moved it. You are gonna need it.

Today, I was left at home alone while my friends went on a trip to Paris I paid for. FML

Yea, I could also pay to get some time for myself…

Today, I told my roommate that I was an atheist and she laughed. I left and returned to find her and her prayer group praying for my soul. She told me to accept Jesus Christ as my lord and savior. I said no. Then she told me to find somewhere else to live. FML

See, accepting Jesus Christ as your lord and savior could have helped you out a lot there.

Today I returned home after three months of vacation. None of my friends had even realized I had left. FML

Next time, just send them postcards and they will know…

Today, I hosted my 6-year-old daughter’s birthday party. After inviting 15 kids from her class, making a huge 2-flavor character cake, and cutting pool noodles for light sabers, only 1 kid showed up. FML

One friend is not so bad those days. And now you have cake for several days.