fml.nu

when life sucks… You can always see it from the bright side

fmylife.com

fmylife.com

  1. By Tank - Today my boss and the director of my office came by to discuss a change to the doors. It was at that moment my stupid possessed tablet in my bag opened pandora to "show tunes" and played 'the internet is for porn'. FML
  2. By ManNeeds2019 - Today is day 28 since a corrective surgery on my urethra. During my recovery I made my wife cum twice while my catheter made erections excruciating. She still hasn't had sex with me and accused me of "treating her like a sex object" for asking. FML
  3. By BurningSensation - Today, I had what I thought was a UTI, so I went to the Dr. Not only did they not find anything, but they had to catheterize me. I went from simple painful urination to feeling like someone is sticking a red hot knife down there every time I use the restroom, and no one seems to know why. FML
  4. By Anonymous - Today, I realized my older, temporary coworker comments every time I yawn, sneeze, cough, leave my desk to use the restroom, and on what I eat at lunch, laughing the whole time. it’s driving me crazy, only 8 more weeks. FML
  5. By maisumepg - Today, it’s the 3rd month of my diet. Every dream I’ve had since I started has been entirely about junk food. Every. Single. One. FML
  6. By "chelbelle90" - I found out that my abusive ex husband not only got just 3 months for almost killing me...they released him almost a week early and authorities never contacted me like they were supposed to; I ended up seeing him driving and I had a panic attack on the freeway...
  7. By Anonymous - Today my stove exploded just a week after my refrigerator unexpectedly stopped working. Great way to start 2019 ! FML
  8. By heathenapparently - Today while driving me to the airport for a trip to Japan my mother started crying. When I asked her why she said "I just know that if the plane crashes I will never see you again because you are going to hell." .. Thank you, mom. I love you too. FML
  9. By something - Today I was walking home from school and my stupid brother who comes earlier then me locked the storm door with no lock. I ended up trying every other door for 3 hours in below freezing temperature. I was numb everywhere. I rang the bell and my brother opened it. He was home the whole time. FML
  10. By "carmasinclair" - Today I broke off my passenger mirror because there was a huge carpet sticking out of a trash can. I hit it barely going 10 miles an hour and now its going to cost 200+ to fix. fml
  11. By - Today my car slid off the road because of black ice. I work two jobs, go to college full-time, and already owe $1300 in various places. Now I have no transportation until I fix my car... which the mechanic said will be $800. Looks like I'm eating ramen for the next year or two. FML.
  12. By "Amanda G Rich" - Today, I had an upset stomach and shit myself in the 1st 30 min at work. I cleaned my pants in the sink and had to walk around in front of everybody with soaked pants until I found my supervisor. FML
  13. By Fanci - Today I found out that my landlord is switching to a property management company, and it will take 2 weeks for my rent to get deposited to them when I send it, when I could just go across town and pay it in cash before. My rent is due in a week. FML
  14. By - Today I started my new job. I slept in, then my SatNav broke. I finally got to the clients house and was knocking on the door for 15 minutes (at 7.30am).....I was knocking on the wrong door. FML
  15. By Insomnia - Today, while trying to sleep after a night shift, workers came to hook up city sewage service, firing up drills and shouting. An hour later, my child woke me up to tattle on her sister. Just as I was drifting to sleep yet again, the smoke alarm battery started chirping. I give up. FML

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