fml.nu

when life sucks… You can always see it from the bright side

It wasn´t a date and it wasn´t Chris Brown…

Today, a guy tried to carjack me. Good news: I drive a stick shift, and the idiot apparently couldn’t, so I still have my car. Bad news: he was so angry, he beat the shit out of me. I had to get stitches, and now I look like I went on a date with Chris Brown. FML

Don´t worry. You have the Walking directions

Today, while waiting for the bus, I googled walking directions to my destination, in case I had already missed the bus. I was so absorbed in my search that I missed the bus. FML

In the future you will have a good story to tell

Today, I went out with two friends for lunch. The van we took ran out of fuel, so we pushed it to a nearby gas station, a gas station suffering from a gas shortage. FML

The cops are always right

Today, a police car hit my parked vehicle, likely due to icy road conditions. When the officer came over to talk to me, I assumed it was to give me his insurance information. Nope. It was to give me a ticket for ‘impeding a police officer’. My car was in my driveway. FML

At least it wasn´t your cars

Today, I accidentally crashed my mom’s car into my dad’s car. FML

That wish actually might help a bit

Today, as I left the supermarket, I found someone had hit my car in the parking lot. There was a note tucked under the wipers. Insurance details? Nope. It just said “Sorry dude. I fucked up. Good luck with the car.” Great. FML