Today, a kid pulled down my shorts while I was ordering at McDonald’s. In my haste to pull them back up, I hit my head on the counter and was knocked out cold. I woke up on the floor, my shorts still around my knees, in a puddle of my own urine. I had peed myself while unconscious. FML
If you have an insurance, it might cover some of this. Oh, yes you need to tell them exactly what happened…
Today, I woke up feeling ill. My mom sent me to school anyway, and grounded me for “lying” about being sick. As soon as I got to school, I began vomiting blood. FML
Great. There you showed her.
Today, my husband broke his toe after tripping over a dog toy. Instead of telling the doctors what happened, he said it was “sex related”. I had to sit there, beet red with embarrassment, getting weird looks while he giggled to himself. FML
Today, I was making sweet potato chips using my new slicer. I didn’t mean to make a pinky finger chip as well. FML